lessons so far

Something wonderful happened today.

I have been looking forward to lectures this week because we have a fantastic speaker in Ross Tooley. When I first saw him, I was pretty disappointed because I thought he was going to be a boring old man. Well he did speak slowly, and was less energetic that I hoped. But this man was full of wisdom and experience. There were just such gems coming from him. Ross is a veteran missionary, number 11 YWAMer and his passion for evangelism was clear.

We’ve been getting wonderful speakers so far. Peter Brownhill was very Aussie in style, C was an excellent teacher. Hmm…it takes one to know. He’s very animated, dramatic and delivers his points very clearly. After his teaching on worship, he got the whole class on their feet dancing with wild abandonment, looking really undignified but full of freedom and joy.
Ari was so inspirational. He’s like our coach, always prompting us, guiding us. His life story totally disarmed the class, convincing us that confession is not about judgment, but God’s freedom and love. And on the actual night when we did the confession (application night), you could really see the wisdom as he very pastorally ministered and prayer for each one of us twice.
Ross didn’t just lecture us…He preached to us. After the first lesson, I was burning inside. He asked us what we were going to do with the next 50 years of our lives.
“Give me 50 years!!” That was my cry. Being one of the oldest in the class, I’m not too sure I’ll have 50 years. But that burnt deep down inside my heart, a mission. I don’t want to be too sure about anything now without asking God, but I think I’ve just been given a time line.
What to do with it? I’ll find out.
The rest of the lessons this week by Ross were very simple stuff. Things that I have even done before, like acts of kindness. I was bursting inside to tell someone, anyone, everyone that I’ve done so many projects with YMM before. But that was just pride acting up. Sigh…Anyway, Ross peppered his lessons with many life stories, many of which are so inspirational. He took us, with his stories, to NZ, to the Philippines, to Kona and back to the Bible, back to Christ. I realized that men who walked closely with God don’t need too much material in their sermons. Just verses and life stories. This man’s life is amazing. 40 years with YWAM. And you can tell that he’s a missionary. He dresses simply, gets excited about evangelism and refuses to even take compliments.
At the end of today’s lesson, I just felt this conviction about evangelism and prayer. There was a pregnant pause before Ross started to pray as he closed the lesson. I just felt my desire to grow increase. I wanted more of the passion to inspire others to know God. I wanted to know Him through prayer.
Then Ross walked up to me, laid hands on my head and started to pray for me. A few things came up. That God wanted to do something in and through my life, and that Perth is not a mistake. I think God knew I needed that assurance that my steps are in order with His will. That Perth was not a wrong step.
My friend said this about me: “so you look terrible, eat terrible, feel terrible, do terrible chores, speak terribly.”
That’s honestly like the summary of how things are looking now.
In the physical.
I do struggle a lot in the physical.
Chores are tough. Food is never enough. People don’t always understand my English…

BUT it’s wonderful! Because I feel connected to God again, and this time, He’s teaching me to strengthen this bond with Him. That’s more important than anything else. Just as my physical body is being stretched(6am morning exercise, sports and chores), my spiritual man is also undergoing training.
I just felt totally envisioned and geared up to know God in a deeper way.
Give me 50 years!



the art of losing myself
in giving you praise

consume me
from the inside out

Extra! Extra! Read all about it!!

Hi everyone
I don’t do this(posting photos of myself) often but since some friends are coming down to Perth, I better quickly show everyone my new hair cut before people die laughing when they see me.
Ok, so my trim-once-in-3-weeks hair was growing and really untidy. I toyed with the idea of growing my hair all the way till next April…but I don’t think I can handle it. It was a novel idea while it lasted. I figured I should just cut my hair so it wouldn’t bother me so much. And as I was going off to the city, my friend Ell offered to cut it for me.
Hmmm…why not? I thought…nothing to lose…nothing to prove…and save money…Hair cuts cost about $14 here. I miss my Malay barber!



So I decided to trust my coursemate and put my confidence in her.It’s not perfectly done as you all can see…but I’m quite happy about it. I look like Japanese now, don’t you think? I’m Simon san! I’m quite happy because I’m trying to learn to live in such that a way that I’m not concerned about my looks…It’s honestly not easy cos people do dress up here… lots of fashion conscious young people in YWAM. Anyway they tell me I look 10 years younger now. Haha

no way we can pay

That’s my quote for the week for week 3.

Repentance and Forgiveness- our topic for the week

I’ve learnt it before
I understand it
I think I know how it works
I’m sure I can even teach it

But I haven’t done it

Not until Friday nite

We had 12 hrs of intense public confession
12 hrs of waiting for each other to break into a choke, a
sob or just break down
12 hrs of remaining silent listening to others
12 hrs of identifying with the “sinner” on the chair
12 hrs of hearing how human we all are despite how we look
12 hrs of embracing each other in prayer, love and acceptance

Each one walks up to the chair placed besides the school leader and lecturer
Then we start to pray
Then it happens

We were encouraged from the start to go deep, 100%.
I think I left no stone unturned.
First time
I’ve always kept somethings hidden in my own closet
But everything came out this time

What do you think of when you see the Cross? I was asked.
I thought about it and I saw me running.
Running towards it
Because the load was too much for me
(just like when I take my instant noodles out of the microwave)
too hot for me to handle

But we were reminded later that
it’s not just about us
It’s not our reaction to sin,
our suffering of the consequences that matters
It’s understanding that it grieves
The One who made us
The One who searched in the Garden when separation happened

I wanted to run
Towards the light
I did
And the freedom never felt better
No way can I pay
And no other way



It’s just like a little girl playing on the beach
There’s no fear because the Father is watching
All around
It’s safe
In His light

Talking about the beach, we went there on Saturday
Greeted by three helicopters in the air circling
Police cars and beach rescue boats were there, even the news video crew
Some boat overturned and they rescued them out of the water



Still, lifeguards had to patrol the beach to make sure no one goes into the water
The rip tide was way too strong. The strongest swimmer could be sucked in and washed out to sea

“I know what I’m doing

I can handle it

I know when to stop…

I think…

If I could…”

Paul knew what he was talking about when he wrote the classic “I-do-what-I-do-not-want-to-do” in romans.

So every strong swimmer will know soon that he’s in trouble

Hebrews tells us He endured our reproach outside the city gates.
Publicly

For your sins and mine
Private

The Maker grieves
The swimmer swims















Walk away.
180 degrees change of direction

Let’s run outside
to Him
The Light beckons

cricket

We played cricket on wednesday. It's like the most boring game in the world.
Sven's face says it all. That's him and Miriam on the crutches...which belongs to Jessica who's the gal in stripes. She sprained her ankle.





That's Silas throwing and Bart is batting.



That's El pitching...she's the kickboxing gal.



That's the other asian in sports DTS. Edwin from m'sia who's staffing SDTS.
It's not me all skinny. I wish.



That's the rest watching. Yup, lots of watching. yawn..


That's roman, my german friend. He's the guy who heard that chinese pple eat dogs. When i told him i had a craving for duck noodles, he wanted to go along cos he wanted to try dog noodles. He kept asking me which type of dog. I just told him it's the normal type. When we got to the vietnamese rest, he was deeply disappointed.

cottesloe beach

This is my short visit to Cottesloe Beach. We had to take a train there and it takes almost 45 min to get there. Even before we got there, we were greeted by sounds of the helicopter(hmmm..wat sound does the helicopter make?) It seems that a small boat capsized and there was a rescue operation. We thought there were sharks! It was actually quite boring. We played volleyball for a while and then it was time to go. had dinner dishes to do.

Sports DTS @ city beach

This is sunset @ City Beach. Owsome!! We played beach soccer(no rules/rugby tackling allowed) and volleyball here. Absolutely lovely.

This is packed dinner, mashed potatoes with hotdogs laden with mustard!! I love mustard. It's like Aussie wassabi. It's my substitute for chilli.

Tat's verena,my german friend, Trisha, school leader and the very funny Henry from Finland




These are our sports dts gals
Jessica sprained her foot when she kicked me during soccer. We were at the Emergency Department till 3am this morning.



We just sat down and watched the sunset as we ate dinner.

The Feast and the sand suckers

This looks good for most people. Even for guys who don't like ang mor breakfast and still pine for bah chor mee. We had this at "the left bank". Vernon bought us breakfast, all the drivers. yah!

Anyway, ever wondered what you must do to hear the voice of God?

It's really what you must NOT do/have in order to hear.

We learnt about these hindrances in tonight's session on the Voice of God:

Fear, Unbelief, Pride & Self-Sufficiency, Rationalism, Apathy, Disobedience and Independence.

And so often we mask ourselves and put on a "I'm-doing-great-even-though-i-have-no-clue-what-God-is-saying" facade. We don't know if He will, don't care, don't want Him to speak.

You stroll by the beach and see this wonderful spread(see pic), choice gourmet, a feast laid out with fine cutlery and china. You snoop around a bit, hands behind your back and think to yourself,"not bad." Then you stoop down on all fours and start sucking on, eating the sand and drinking the seawater beneath you. You're hungry and the sand's "not too bad".

That's often the pathetic us.

God wants to speak but we're chewing on sand. "it's good enough...for now. I know what I'm doing."



this is the air i breathe
Your very word
living in me


"who will ascend the heavens...who will cross the sea to get it to us so that we may obey it?"
No, the word is very near you; it is in your mouth and in your heart so that you might obey it."
Deut 30:12-15


unclog. release. take in again.

stillness

I've been hearing this word over and over again the last few weeks. Calmness, restedness. It's a state of the heart where you're not fighting, not struggling. Just like that little petal floating. The rapids are just ahead but the waters are still calm and still.
Over this period, i'm drawn to this peace and confidence that He offers. Without having to prove my worth, myself. It's the awareness that all He wants is you. Not your ministry,your service or sacrifice.

but just you.

sometimes that's the costliest thing to surrender. On the outside we're all right, but beneath, we're furiously paddling like the ducks.

Mary and Martha. Who messed up? It could be anyone of them. You could be serving sacrifically, but the moment you sneer at someone doing any less than you, you've lost it. Drip drop. Or when you so brilliantly conclude that someone needs to heard this or learn that beacuse they are so less spiritual than you. You've lost the joy and the ripples appear on your streams.


i will be still
know You are God

weekend outing to sepertine national park

Not in a blogging mood, but here are the photos...beautiful place, 1 hr ride there..we had our sandwiches(bread again). most of them took the plunge and swam at the waterfall u see int he picture. not very exciting..i think the best part of today for me was waking up at 830am instead of 530am.

a glimpse into my life @YWAM Sports DTS

Presenting....Sports DTS!!

G'day!

My daily routine begins at 6am everyday and we head out to the park to exercise. We played soccer yesterday afternoon and this morning we did Ultimate Frisbee. It was a great way to warm up in the cold morning. After that we head back to our bunks to eat breakfast, do our quiet time and shower.

I’m still hating my breakfast and dreaming of my “bah chor mee“ and kopi C.
My mum will be so proud. I slice off 3 pieces fo wholegrain bread (yucks!) and put it on the toaster (usually cold, maybe stale?). Then yesterday I bought a jar of Nutella yum!! (1kg) and am sharing it with Philipp, my German friend. He loves it. Nutella is from Germany by the way. Anything taste good with Nutella! One of my friends Shirley bought me a carton of Indo Mee already! 30 packs for $7.90! Yah!! Can’t wait!

I just finished my work duty..this is not funny i tell you...worse than army's area cleaning..And we do work twice a day..in the morning, it's a 25 min routine called family chores. I stack up the 350 ++ chairs in the dinner area and we mop the wooden floor and lay out the chairs again in time for breakfast. We also have to sweep/vacuum the auditorium and the classrooms...

Then there's this work duty we do DAILY..from 130 to 330. I've been assigned to the kitchen to do dishes...I think i washed more stuff than i ever did my whole life...350 to 400 people eat every meal and the cutlery, pots and pans, knives, chopping board..my back almost broke...i have this strange backache that comes up whenever i do house work...our seniors were like singing and joking as they did the chores but i was in pain...and looking very serious..haha...some of the seniors came up to chat with me cos i wasn't smiling..hahaha...sigh...
some things in life catches up with u...i bet all my past maids would be laughing viciously now if they read this.

Hey, but it's good training of the mind...especially after i learnt about Mary and Martha, about being busy and losing joy..the key's with the joy part..it's all mental...in the head and the heart...I keep thinking of Brother Lawerence and the practicing the presence of God in the kitchen...it's tough! I wanted to tell the younger guy off for his lack of effort in scrubing the dishes...i was exploding inside..but decided to volunteer to change task with him instead..i did the scrubbing and he did the drying.

We had an amazing time of singing just now. We sang “There is none like You” and after a few times, people from different nations came up and sang it in their native language. We had Dutch, Finnish, Korean, and African? It was amazing because many people broke down and wept as they sang.

I wept too. For my own inability to sing it in Mandarin (haha), and also for the stark reminder that God loves the nations of the earth. ( i downloaded it and am going to master it!!)That He touches every heart, regardless of race, language or gender. The song turned into a prayer, that the peoples of the earth will seek Him as they search endlessly for meaning and truth. The worships are fantastic..only 1 guitar but the chorus of voices(pple sing very well here) filling the room is really a constant reminder of what heaven might be like...people from all nations, worship our God..that really gets to me..wow..I got this video recording of us singing "How great thou art" and it was a hair raising moment indeed.

I'm sending my other updates via my friend daryl. If you'll like a copy, pls drop me a mail and i'll put you on the list. But get the update MUST PRAY wan harh!!

alright, great! excellent!!
owsome!
cheers mate!

perth so far

this is The Quest at Fremantle , where we stayed for 2 nights! yeah!


1 cutie and...

3 pretty gals

Introducing the MT line...aka drivers

.(Godsent hokkien buddy)
"as a matter in fact", we is having a lot of fun.

an ah lim and ah cheo production





this is daryl from fcc. he's not praying. just watching tv. Happens to be my classmate "charles" cousin. small world.


that's shirley and ian

shirley's got a crazy laughter and funny voice to go along.
ian is amazing. reminds me big time of my dear mr andy mindarwi.
He's an old soul trapped in a younger body.

That's vernon in the driver's seat. That's one of our 3 Taragoes...Estimas in Singapore, i think...vernon happens to be AB and dawei's church mate in Zion BP. amazing


these guys
2 words- divine appointments
thanks guys, i had fun.This is really a wonderful transition for me.




my best friend for the next 6 mths